Please Pray for the families of all these Cherubs lost in March...
♥ Dougie ♥ Andrew ♥ Aurora ♥ Zoe S. ♥ Logan ♥ Maggie ♥
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Monday, March 14, 2011
March 14, 2011 - Additional Entries from Mommy
(From Mommy's Facebook Page)
Saw Jay. I was fine until mom left. Then the crying came out in a bomb. I started telling him about this day & the more I said the bigger the tears. When we were there my mom told me Zoe was not doing well off ECMO I told Jay to be with her & help her be OK. PLEASE pray for her & her family! I LOVE HIM SO MUCH to think about today & all it means it's just TOO MUCH!
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I just don't think I can handle day. Every little thing is making me BURST out in tears and I just can't stop crying and thinking about my Jayden at all. I truly feel I am going to crack and fall more than ever before. I just don't think I can handle SO MUCH pain!!! WHY HIM?? WHY HIM?? OH DEAR GOD WHY NOT ME!!!!!!!
Saw Jay. I was fine until mom left. Then the crying came out in a bomb. I started telling him about this day & the more I said the bigger the tears. When we were there my mom told me Zoe was not doing well off ECMO I told Jay to be with her & help her be OK. PLEASE pray for her & her family! I LOVE HIM SO MUCH to think about today & all it means it's just TOO MUCH!
----------------------------------------
I just don't think I can handle day. Every little thing is making me BURST out in tears and I just can't stop crying and thinking about my Jayden at all. I truly feel I am going to crack and fall more than ever before. I just don't think I can handle SO MUCH pain!!! WHY HIM?? WHY HIM?? OH DEAR GOD WHY NOT ME!!!!!!!
March 14, 2011 - Mommy's Message to Jayden...
(From Mommy's Facebook Page)
1 year ago today my Jayden returned to Heaven after fighting for life for 23 days. He truly was a brave strong baby and will always have my heart. I love and miss him MORE THEN LIFE ITSELF.
Fly high my precious Jayden mommy loves you ALWAYS!
1 year ago today my Jayden returned to Heaven after fighting for life for 23 days. He truly was a brave strong baby and will always have my heart. I love and miss him MORE THEN LIFE ITSELF.
Fly high my precious Jayden mommy loves you ALWAYS!
Sunday, March 13, 2011
March 13, 2011 - Jayden's New Video - Finally!!!
(From Grandma's Facebook Page)
After a false start out of the gates yesterday I think (crossing fingers) that we are good to go with Jayden's Reflection video. I still see so many slides that could be SO much better but that is probably the perfectionist in me. I fixed all the major errors that were found and got the missing slide back in. Please be merciful.
Tomorrow is Jayden's 1 yr angelversary. Perhaps it is fitting that I did not make the earlier deadlines. I hope he is proud. I know we are SO very proud of him!
Here is the summary for those who may be watching on their phones & can't view it.
------------------------------------------------
Jayden's Reflection Video - Happy 1st Birthday Jayden!
It has been a year since our Cherub angel Jayden was born and grew his wings. Although he is no longer with us, he is forever in our hearts and is still reaching out to touch others and help other families with CDH.
Please join us as we look back on his time. If you are touched by his and all the angel stories please go to http://www.cdhsupport.org/ -or- http://www.savethecherubs.org/ to learn more about Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia and find out how you can support this most worthy cause. "Help Save The Cherubs!"
NOTE: Since this video was created we have lost 2 more Cherubs....
Fly high little Andrew M. & Aurora!
*** Friends in Germany - Sorry that YouTube blocked it.***
For more from Vanessa Cruz, visit her channel at TheVanessaCruz, http://www.youtube.com/user/TheVanessaCruz
For more from Jumoke Hill, visit his channel at JumokeTV, http://www.youtube.com/user/JumokeTV
--------------------------------------------------------
Thanks for all your love & support!!!
Alicia, Jayden & Shelly
If I missed any one it was not intentional, please know you are all remembered too!!
After a false start out of the gates yesterday I think (crossing fingers) that we are good to go with Jayden's Reflection video. I still see so many slides that could be SO much better but that is probably the perfectionist in me. I fixed all the major errors that were found and got the missing slide back in. Please be merciful.
Tomorrow is Jayden's 1 yr angelversary. Perhaps it is fitting that I did not make the earlier deadlines. I hope he is proud. I know we are SO very proud of him!
Here is the summary for those who may be watching on their phones & can't view it.
------------------------------------------------
Jayden's Reflection Video - Happy 1st Birthday Jayden!
It has been a year since our Cherub angel Jayden was born and grew his wings. Although he is no longer with us, he is forever in our hearts and is still reaching out to touch others and help other families with CDH.
Please join us as we look back on his time. If you are touched by his and all the angel stories please go to http://www.cdhsupport.org/ -or- http://www.savethecherubs.org/ to learn more about Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia and find out how you can support this most worthy cause. "Help Save The Cherubs!"
NOTE: Since this video was created we have lost 2 more Cherubs....
Fly high little Andrew M. & Aurora!
*** Friends in Germany - Sorry that YouTube blocked it.***
If you would like to see Jayden's memorial video from 2010 you can view it at
For more from Vanessa Cruz, visit her channel at TheVanessaCruz, http://www.youtube.com/user/TheVanessaCruz
For more from Jumoke Hill, visit his channel at JumokeTV, http://www.youtube.com/user/JumokeTV
--------------------------------------------------------
Thanks for all your love & support!!!
Alicia, Jayden & Shelly
If I missed any one it was not intentional, please know you are all remembered too!!
Saturday, March 12, 2011
March 12, 2011 - A Letter to my Son for his 7 Month Birthday (Aug 19, 2010)
(From Mommy's Facebook Page)
To my son Jayden how I miss you so, everyday I cry inside because you're not here.
I miss your hand around my finger and looking into your eyes. I remember the first time I changed your diaper and took your temperature, the doctor said you calmed down when I did all those things. I think it's because you knew it was me.
Oh my sweet baby Jayden 23 days on this earth was just not enough and for that my "Lil' Man" I will always have the hurt of losing you just way too soon.
I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!!!!
FOREVER YOUR MOMMY.
I miss your hand around my finger and looking into your eyes. I remember the first time I changed your diaper and took your temperature, the doctor said you calmed down when I did all those things. I think it's because you knew it was me.
Oh my sweet baby Jayden 23 days on this earth was just not enough and for that my "Lil' Man" I will always have the hurt of losing you just way too soon.
I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!!!!
FOREVER YOUR MOMMY.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
March 10, 2011 - Jayden's Video & Reminders About Life...
Jayden's Video & Reminders About Life...
by Grandma on her Facebook Notes on Thursday, March 10, 2011 at 2:06 am
The reflection video is all but done. It needs a couple of minor adjustments & final proofing but those will go quickly. I had to make a major change in the music setup but I think it will work better overall & it helps me not to have certain clips rushed I felt were important not be rushed. I also found a way to add in a neat new feature I had not done in prior videos.
All week my mind kept going back to how precious life is & how important it is to treasure every moment we have as we DON'T know when it will be our last. I am still saddened that an important family member & their family has been shaken so deeply by the sudden loss of a close friend who seemed to have their whole life ahead of them & was cut down tragically last weekend by an undetected medical condition.
I also got an email this week from another family member that a relative who has been in a long battle with cancer had a new growth WHILE undergoing chemo. I worry another part of the family who we have lost contact with may be having medical issues (trust me, I am trying to reconnect!). And of course there is always the constant question of is today the day Marfan's takes my husband?
I try to stay positive and usually can, but this week, coming up on Jayden's Angelversary on Monday is just a little harder than usual. It is a reminder... Hug the important people in your life while you still can, treasure them & love them.
Don't forget & then have to say "Sorry, I never told you, all I wanted to say."
Love to all of you...
Shelly
by Grandma on her Facebook Notes on Thursday, March 10, 2011 at 2:06 am
The reflection video is all but done. It needs a couple of minor adjustments & final proofing but those will go quickly. I had to make a major change in the music setup but I think it will work better overall & it helps me not to have certain clips rushed I felt were important not be rushed. I also found a way to add in a neat new feature I had not done in prior videos.
All week my mind kept going back to how precious life is & how important it is to treasure every moment we have as we DON'T know when it will be our last. I am still saddened that an important family member & their family has been shaken so deeply by the sudden loss of a close friend who seemed to have their whole life ahead of them & was cut down tragically last weekend by an undetected medical condition.
I also got an email this week from another family member that a relative who has been in a long battle with cancer had a new growth WHILE undergoing chemo. I worry another part of the family who we have lost contact with may be having medical issues (trust me, I am trying to reconnect!). And of course there is always the constant question of is today the day Marfan's takes my husband?
I try to stay positive and usually can, but this week, coming up on Jayden's Angelversary on Monday is just a little harder than usual. It is a reminder... Hug the important people in your life while you still can, treasure them & love them.
Don't forget & then have to say "Sorry, I never told you, all I wanted to say."
One Sweet Day
Love to all of you...
Shelly
Monday, March 7, 2011
Friday, March 4, 2011
March 4, 2011 - Birthday Video Update
(From Grandma's FB Page)
OK, so it's obvious I have too many slides & NOT enough music. All the month markers are gonna have to go. Besides the dates in the pictures should pretty much set the timeline. Now to see what else I can cut or modify...
I would NEVER make it as a video editor. My head HURTS! It's worth it though for Jayden & CHERUBS...
OK, so it's obvious I have too many slides & NOT enough music. All the month markers are gonna have to go. Besides the dates in the pictures should pretty much set the timeline. Now to see what else I can cut or modify...
I would NEVER make it as a video editor. My head HURTS! It's worth it though for Jayden & CHERUBS...
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
March 2, 2011 - A letter to my Son on his 1st Birthday
(From Mommy's FB Page)
"A letter to my son on his 1st Birthday" by his Mom
Read Graveside on Feb 19, 2011
Posted to FB - March 2, 2011
One year ago today I welcomed the cutest, strongest, most perfect baby ever to come into the world and that baby was you. Every day I saw you fight like you never knew the words give up or let go and it was that strength you showed that told me to keep fighting for you and with you.
Then one day I went to your bedside and saw a baby still fighting to live trapped in a body that had already gave up and I knew that day I had to use the strength I had come to feel through you to let you go and finally be truly free and at peace, but I want you to know to make the choice to let you go was the hardest thing I ever had to do and every day I miss you more and more. I know I now have an angel always watching over me and for that I can smile even as I cry deep inside.
I want you to know CDH may have taken your life, but I will do ALL I can to stop it from taken any more because of the strength and memories you gave me, it may have been 1 year since you were born, but to me it feels like it was just yesterday.
I want you to know you are the BEST thing ever to happen to me and my proudest accomplishment and I will NEVER let you go or forget you. For ALL you gave me and ALL you have and will do I thank you and will ALWAYS LOVE YOU!
HAPPY 1ST BIRTHDAY Jayden,
Mommy's Lil' Man forever.
"A letter to my son on his 1st Birthday" by his Mom
Read Graveside on Feb 19, 2011
Posted to FB - March 2, 2011
One year ago today I welcomed the cutest, strongest, most perfect baby ever to come into the world and that baby was you. Every day I saw you fight like you never knew the words give up or let go and it was that strength you showed that told me to keep fighting for you and with you.
Then one day I went to your bedside and saw a baby still fighting to live trapped in a body that had already gave up and I knew that day I had to use the strength I had come to feel through you to let you go and finally be truly free and at peace, but I want you to know to make the choice to let you go was the hardest thing I ever had to do and every day I miss you more and more. I know I now have an angel always watching over me and for that I can smile even as I cry deep inside.
I want you to know CDH may have taken your life, but I will do ALL I can to stop it from taken any more because of the strength and memories you gave me, it may have been 1 year since you were born, but to me it feels like it was just yesterday.
I want you to know you are the BEST thing ever to happen to me and my proudest accomplishment and I will NEVER let you go or forget you. For ALL you gave me and ALL you have and will do I thank you and will ALWAYS LOVE YOU!
HAPPY 1ST BIRTHDAY Jayden,
Mommy's Lil' Man forever.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Feb 28, 2011 - CDH Cherubs Lost in Feb 2011
Please keep the families of these Cherubs lost in your prayers...
♥ Max ♥ Kelley ♥ Landon ♥ Travis Jr ♥
♥ Max ♥ Kelley ♥ Landon ♥ Travis Jr ♥
Feb 28, 2011 - Video Getting Close...
(From Grandma's FB Page)
Finished the re-edit on part 1 of the video. Although I see at least 4 slides that could look better they are presentable so I'm not gonna mess with them since I am so far behind...
Part 3 will be a quick edit but part 2.... sleep, what's sleep?
Finished the re-edit on part 1 of the video. Although I see at least 4 slides that could look better they are presentable so I'm not gonna mess with them since I am so far behind...
Part 3 will be a quick edit but part 2.... sleep, what's sleep?
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Feb 24, 2011 - Another Delay on Jayden's Rememberance Video...
(From Grandma's FB Page)
Video is close to done but had an 11th hour message from someone that needs to be in it, so will hold on the final edits for a few hours to give them time to get material to me. Won't be too long...
Video is close to done but had an 11th hour message from someone that needs to be in it, so will hold on the final edits for a few hours to give them time to get material to me. Won't be too long...
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Feb 22, 2011 - Jayden's First Video Hit 300 views!
(From Grandma's Facebook Page)
So proud of how many people have heard about CDH that never knew about it before.
The second video is still in the works (I need a way to make more hours in the day!) but will be done this week somehow or another!
We are proud of you little angel Jayden!
So proud of how many people have heard about CDH that never knew about it before.
The second video is still in the works (I need a way to make more hours in the day!) but will be done this week somehow or another!
We are proud of you little angel Jayden!
Jayden's CDH Story 2/19/10 - 3/14/10
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Feb 20, 2011 - Jayden please be with mommy today...
From Mommy's FB Page...
Going to grandma's 4 a party.
I hope I do OK with the new baby that's going to be there.
Jayden please be with mommy today.
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Feb 19, 2011 - Happy 1st Heavenly Birthday Jayden from Mommy & Grandma
(From Mommy's FB Page)
Just celebrated Jay's birthday at the cemetery with my mom. It was perfect! I LOVE AND MISS YOU MY BABY!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(From Grandma's FB Page)
One year ago today I became Grandma to one of the 3 most beautiful grandchildren in the whole wide world. You will forever be with us Jayden. Grandma misses you!!!! ♥♥♥
Just celebrated Jay's birthday at the cemetery with my mom. It was perfect! I LOVE AND MISS YOU MY BABY!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(From Grandma's FB Page)
One year ago today I became Grandma to one of the 3 most beautiful grandchildren in the whole wide world. You will forever be with us Jayden. Grandma misses you!!!! ♥♥♥
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Feb 13, 2011 - A Song for our Angels...
(From Mommy's Facebook Page)
Lyrics from a song I truly feel our angels think as they fly into Heaven.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Wings to Fly
Want to spread my wings and fly
Away into the sky
How I dream to be so free
No more sadness no more pain
No more anger no more hate
How I dream to have those wings and fly into the sky
If now, I could grant my wish
I'd wish to have those wings
Those wings just like the birds
That fly up in the air
So high up in the air
With feathers bright and fair
No wealth nor power can make
My heart filled with such joy
Want to spread my wings and fly
Away into the sky
How I dream to be so free
No more sadness no more pain
No more anger no more hate
How I dream to have those wings and fly into the sky
The skyyyy
Want to spread my wings and fly
Away into the sky
How I dream to be so free
No more sadness no more pain
No more anger no more hate
How I dream to have those wings and fly into the sky
The skyyyyy...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Wings to Fly
Want to spread my wings and fly
Away into the sky
How I dream to be so free
No more sadness no more pain
No more anger no more hate
How I dream to have those wings and fly into the sky
If now, I could grant my wish
I'd wish to have those wings
Those wings just like the birds
That fly up in the air
So high up in the air
With feathers bright and fair
No wealth nor power can make
My heart filled with such joy
Want to spread my wings and fly
Away into the sky
How I dream to be so free
No more sadness no more pain
No more anger no more hate
How I dream to have those wings and fly into the sky
The skyyyy
Want to spread my wings and fly
Away into the sky
How I dream to be so free
No more sadness no more pain
No more anger no more hate
How I dream to have those wings and fly into the sky
The skyyyyy...
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Feb 12, 2011 - Upcoming Valentine's Day...
(From Mommy's Facebook Page)
This Valentine's day is going to suck since Jay passed on the 14th
EVERY Valentine's day will be a double edge sword.
A time of that being the month before his angelversary need I say more?
Mom and I are going up tomorrow to put up lots of Valentine's day stuff and then I return ON Valentine's day to mark his 11 month Angelversary.
Then the 19th is his 1st Birthday...
Man this month is HARD.
Feb 11, 2011 - Headstone Paid For!!
(From Mommy's Facebook Page)
I got my son's headstone paid for today.
They said it should be done by his one year angelversary on March 14th.
Please pray it is done on time and comes out just right as I have waited SO LONG and worked SO hard just to get it done this soon and make it look perfect for him.
Soon my Lil' Man ALL will know you're there!
Friday, February 4, 2011
Feb 4 , 2011 - Close to Finally Getting Jayden's Headstone!
(From Grandma's FB Page)
Jayden's proof for his headstone came in yesterday.
Alicia it said it looks perfect! {smile & tears}
Tax refund should be in next week & we can get it on order.
Hopefully it will be here by his Angelversary next month...
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Feb 2, 2011 - Flashback...
(From Grandma's FB Page)
The drive into Portland tonight brought flashbacks to a year ago & those many trips driving in after dark going to the hospital when Alicia was having false & premature labor with Jayden...
The drive into Portland tonight brought flashbacks to a year ago & those many trips driving in after dark going to the hospital when Alicia was having false & premature labor with Jayden...
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